Layney’s Lifestyle

High School is coming to an end and I can’t help but feel emotional. I once said when I came in as a freshman that these four years were gonna go by so slow but to be honest they flew faster than I could have ever imagined. If I have any advice for any incoming students it would definitely be to cherish these times.

I’m excited to go out and conquer the world as an adult but I’m also very scared. The world has become something that it was not before. Society has changed, people have changed. I guess it’s a part of life but the way the world has kind of shifted negatively isn’t exactly what I expected growing up. I feel as if everything has changed, from the color of the grass to all the price changes in the world.

I’ve met quite a bit of my goals this year. Obviously I’ve gone through some obstacles at the beginning of 2023. For the age of 17 and being pregnant though, I truly feel like I’m doing good. I have responsibilities, and I take them pretty seriously. My freshman and sophomore year I completely didn’t care about school at all. I didn’t do any of my homework, I didn’t make the best decisions, that’s for sure. Although, I will say, I was not at all a trouble maker in school. Though, me not doing homework didn’t make life the easiest because at some point I always said in those two years, “it’s time to get my life together,” and then I’d be rushing to get things done so I could at LEAST pass my classes, whether I had passed with an A, B or C, or even the lowest percentage of a D. If I could go back and redo those two years, I wouldn’t think twice about making the decision to do so.

Since I had slacked off so much the first two years of high school instead of getting everything done that I needed to get done, it had definitely made my junior and senior year a lot more difficult. I knew I had to work harder though because I wanted the improvement of myself and for others to see it as well. Although, junior year was not nearly as hard as senior year has been, but then again like I have said, it’s much different obstacles than last year.

My biggest goal in life is to get to where I’m comfortable, financially, physically and mentally. My biggest thing I’ve thought about for the past year is growing up to be stable and now that I have a baby on the way it’s really big for me to be stable so my son can have a good life. I know if I work hard enough I can attain this goal.

Thank you all for going through my senior year with me. It’s been a true blessing!

My life has changed so much in just a short amount of time. It is definitely not what I expected it to be, that’s for sure.

I found out at the end of January that I’m pregnant. It has definitely changed me drastically. I have many goals that I still am going to reach. I know that it’ll be pretty hard but I know that anybody can do anything as long as they put their mind to it. That’s something I’ve started to learn. You have to have determination. If you go into something thinking you can’t do it, that’s when things fall negative. That is something that I’ve tried to teach my brother with his wrestling and I think he’s starting to understand but I need to take my own advice.

Things have definitely gotten stressful for me. Being pregnant at 17, going to school, and going to work life gets a little rough. Especially trying to find time for appointments but can’t really afford to miss school, because of how fast you get behind and not being able to afford to miss work because you have a baby to save for. Stress is the main thing the doctors tell you to keep down but I honestly don’t see how anyone can keep stress down. Life has become hard for everyone and as a pregnant woman, it’s become worse. I’m trying to stay positive about everything as much as I can but with everyone being negative around me and talking to me about my situation negatively it’s a little hard. Obviously though, I just need to learn to push it away.

I’ve lost quite a bit of friends. I feel as if nobody wants to hardly be around me anymore because I can’t do the things that “normal” teenagers do. The thing is though, I’m perfectly fine with not being able to do those things. The main thing I need to do is worry about keeping myself healthy so I have a healthy baby. I also need to stay determined so I can pursue my dreams and make a good life for the baby and I.

I know I can do it, I just have to put my mind to it!

I’m just gonna start by saying my main biggest fear is definitely dying. I know everybody’s probably scared but every single little way of dying, I think I could die that way. I actually just talked to my doctor because I thought I was a hypochondriac but she reassured me that a lot of people with anxiety take something and put it into the worst case scenario. I will literally sit there and hear about something, like say a brain aneurysm, I will sit there and think I have one. Honestly I think the biggest thing that worries me about a brain aneurysm is that you won’t even know until it explodes. Just for that reason I really feel like our whole bodies should be scanned at least every 5 years. Although, it’s very expensive so it’ll never happen.

Another one of my fears is giving birth. I think about all of the possible things that could go wrong during labor. Some of those things include death between mom or baby, having to have an emergency c-section, and just giving birth all together.

A random fear I have is puking. Every single time I have to puke, no kidding, I will have a panic attack before I do so. I once saw this post on Facebook. It said something like “puking is like turning into a werwolf and that has got to be the most accurate way to describe it. I think I would honestly do anything in the world to not puke.

Anyway, I’m sure I’m fearful from a lot more things but thats the few I can think of right now.

I started to realize more as 2022 was ending that I’m actually growing up. I’m scared to go off into life on my own but I know that it’s something I need to do to just better myself in general.

I’m really upset about the fact that I’m going to be leaving my little brother. I won’t really be home as much to watch him play football or wrestle. I’m usually around to see everything he accomplishes and I know it’ll be a big adaptation.

I think that Cort, my brother, will be pretty bored without me. We’re both pretty much homebodies so we’re home after we’ve got off of work and practice and then we usually just hangout. He doesn’t like to show his feelings but I know we’ll both miss each other very much.

I actually find myself thinking about how I won’t be coming into another year of high school in the fall. That’s the main part that has me mind blown, but I think it’s because I’ve grown to feel very comfortable here. At the same time I find myself wishing for graduation to come faster because I’m ready to take on the world and have new things to learn.

I hope to move away from home so I can learn how to be by myself and not depend on anybody at a young age.

My mom and I have a rough back and forth relationship. I’m hoping that whenever I move out it can help us not bicker at each other as much. The only reason I think we bicker at each other like we do is because we’re so much alike, not just in looks but personality.

It really amazes me how we’re going to be graduating in 5 months. I’m so nervous but so excited at the same time. Now onto college.

A lot of people in my town know about the two boys that passed on August 15th, 2021, that lived twenty minutes from us. Although, I’d like to let the world know about them.

I’m going to describe their personalities so it’s a little easier to understand. Gage Bell is very live in the moment. He was always so happy and was never worried about anything bad. Gage Klein was also live in the moment but he also watched his decisions a lot more. He was more of a giving type of person. He did a lot for everyone around him and always was the one to make sure everyone was happy.

It all started December of 2020. Gage Bell messages me on snapchat trying to hangout with me. Unfortunately at that time I hadn’t known him so I was a little nervous and blew it off. Him and I then reconnected May of 2021 when we first hung out. We were also with Gage Klein, the other Gage that passed away.

A couple of weeks later, I introduced Gage K and Brenna, which some may know of, and we all instantly become super close with each other. We spent the whole summer together all of us four.

One of my favorites memories is when all of us went to DQ in Atlanta and Brenna just wanted their toast from there and Gage K was so upset about having to pay like a dollar for it. Haha a dollar!

Another one of my favorites memories is when we were going on a cruise through the state park and Gage B was feeling very adventurous and wanted to go on a walk through the wooded area of the park. All three of us said no so therefore Gage B never went on the walk.

A great memory I have was my sixteenth birthday. My mom rented a hotel room and the Gages came. We all wanted to swim but they had forgotten to bring things to swim in. So as a solution, we put them in female Nike dry fit shorts. My goodness, they weren’t even close to being big enough for them. Due to them being uncomfortable we didn’t go and swim haha.

My favorite part about hanging out with these three is that we could literally talk about whatever and not get judged by each other. The friendships were all genuine and it was a great time.

Of course there’s so many other things I can talk about but I’m just gonna leave it at some of my favorite memories.

Unfortunately my brother was the one to tell me they passed. I was completely lost for a few months but I started to feel like myself again. It’ll never feel the same without them but I know they’re in a better place, just wish it didn’t have to be so soon.

I’m so thankful I got to know these two boys before their lives were taken. This has definitely changed me as a person. It’s good to know I have two great angels watching over me! Until we meet again.

My sister got engaged!

And I’m the maid of honor. If you don’t know the job of a maid of honor it’s basically planning the whole wedding. My sister, whose name is Kayla, has 6 other bridesmaids. Their names are Searra, Tieriny, Krissy, Chelsie, Libby and Kaden. Searra, Tieriny and Krissy are three of her close friends. Krissy grew up with her and she met the other two when we moved to Lincoln. Chelsie and Libby are our little cousins. Then Kaden which I’ve mentioned before is a very close family friend. He is considered to be a “brides-man” in her wedding.

Anyways, we had her first dress appointed November 12th and when I say first, it was also her last. She tried on 6 or 7 dresses. Almost got the 2nd to last dress but ended up picking the last dress she tried on. She instantly fell in love with her dress. I really liked this mermaid style dress on her and she almost picked that one before the other two but decided with the last one.

After the dress appointment we went to eat at Kuchies on the Water, a weird name, I know. The only thing we did was get drinks because we all didn’t see anything really appetizing on the menu at the time. We’ve all eaten there before but we were all crabby from wanting to go home from being tired so we just left after that. Unfortunately we didn’t have all the bridesmaids at the appointment. Krissy, Tieriny and Searra weren’t there. Krissy lives two hours away and was running behind but met us at Kuchies on the Water. We sat there and talked for a while though because Krissy and Kayla hadn’t seen each other for a while and neither had the rest of us. We all knew her, including my grandma who was there as well because Kayla lived with my grandma for 12 years and that’s when Krissy and Kayla were best friends. It was nice seeing Krissy and I can see all of us girls and boy having so much fun with this.

Now to start getting ideas for the Bachelorette party!

My family and I went on a trip to the Ozarks in Missouri. We also took one of my friends and one of my brother’s friends. The people who went on the trip were my stepdad, my mom, my sister Chance and her boyfriend Matt, my sister Kayla and her boyfriend Travis, my brother Cort and Talan, his friend, and lastly Rhiannyn (Nan) and I. We also brought our dog, Bruno. I drove Cort, Talan, Nan and I down there in the Volvo s80 and then my sister Chance and her boyfriend drove in her car with our dog. My parents drove on their motorcycle and so did my sister Kayla and her boyfriend on their bike.

Chance and I followed each other down there but my parents and Kayla were already there because they went the night before since they were on the bikes. As soon as Chance and I arrived with everyone else we instantly jumped into the lake. We got there at about 4 and were in the water till about 8. We had our own dock so after we were done swimming Cort, Talan, Nan and I sat on the dock and enjoyed the cool night breeze. After we had went back up to the house Kayla had asked me to get this speaker for her and I went to get it and when I was walking back I tripped and fell over the ledge of the deck and scraped my legs all up. After that I went to bed for the night.

The second day we were there we spent the whole day swimming. We all got so sunburnt it was miserable sleeping that night. While we were swimming I realized that being in a lake is kind of terrifying because it’s impossible to see the bottom. I like to be able to see what I’m doing and I don’t really like the idea of fish touching me or whatever else is in the lake. We ended up eating cheeseburgers and hot dogs for dinner that night on the grill. Later that night while Cort, Talan, Nan and I were on the dock, we had neighbors staying in a house and there were a bunch of girls outside and they offered us all s’mores.

The third day we had a boat day. We got even more sunburnt. We spent like 8 hours on the lake, it was insane. When we got back, Cort, Talan, Nan and I all went to Neon Tacos with my sister Kayla and her boyfriend, Travis. I got a hot cheeto burrito and it was amazing. When we got back home we all were passed out pretty early, I think we were all wore out from the day on the boat.

We went home the next day and we were all so glad to be home. It was a fun trip but everyone gets a little homesick.

To start off the week, our school does a dress up week for homecoming. A ton of students participate in it and it is a lot of fun. I’m going to tell you guys all about my homecoming week at my school.

Monday was pajama day but I didn’t dress up because I had work after school. Tuesday was college attire and I also didn’t participate in that because I forgot. Wednesday was senior dress up day, I did participate in it since I’m a senior and we had our class picture at 7:30 in the morning. Thursday was Hawaiian wear which I didn’t participate in because I had no Hawaiian clothes. Lastly Friday was a red and green day for our school colors and I wore a green football T-shirt because it was also our Varsity Homecoming football game! I think the score was 64-14, we lost. Friday I had also had my friend Nan come for the weekend and she accompanied me at the Homecoming dance. Saturday we started our day off by going and getting coffee. Then we started getting ready for the dance and by the time we were done getting ready and taking pictures it was time for us to go out of town and eat dinner. We ate at an Italian place called Bella Milano, we both had Fettuccine Alfredo. We got back and went to the dance. Unfortunately we weren’t there for very long because it was kind of boring. So we went back to my house and had some friends over with a fire. Then Sunday I had to go and pick up 18 mums which are actually Chrysanthemum flowers. We had a fundraiser for school and all together I sold 20+ mums.

All together I had a pretty good week. I hung out with a lot of good people and I’ve never been more happy in my life. I hope to have a lot more days like last week.